Hmmm… is that truly possible? I mean, can one man and one woman actually achieve “Together Forever Always” …’till death do they part? Yes, the Bible tells us in Mathew 19 that a man and woman will unite and that the two will become one flesh, and “…what God has joined together, let no one separate.” But really?? Clearly, when God inspired Matthew to record this command, He could not possibly have been privy to the challenges, obstacles, and distractions that couples would face today. This command may have been doable back in biblical days but in today’s relationships, it’s just not that simple.
How are couples supposed to maintain oneness while navigating the challenges of blended families and mental health? How are marriages supposed to survive communication obstacles and barriers? How do they remain unified with all of today’s surmounting distractions like pandemics, social and civil unrest, inequality, economic tension, and corruption, looming daily? When you tie all of that together with cords of perverse cultural influence, it’s easy to check out of your marriage; mentally, physically, and spiritually. What was God thinking?!?!
I’m so glad you asked. God was clear- headed and intentional when He gave us the beautiful gift of marriage. First, marriage designed by God is a covenant: a spiritually binding promise between God, man, and woman. New York Times best-selling author Timothy Keller, in his book The Meaning of Marriage, explains that “at the heart of the Biblical idea of marriage is the covenant” and in Christ, the covenant is both law (Gen 2:24) and love (1 Jn 4:7-21). He further explains how “the marriage relationship is unique and is the most deeply covenantal relationship possible between two human beings.” Now that is deep! God gifted us with this amazing relationship so that we can experience here on earth a glimpse of our future eternal home! Marriage represents Christ’s relationship to the church, and it should exhibit the character of God, and its witness should stir up a craving in others to want to know Him for themselves.
“Marriage is supposed to tell the truth about who God is.” ~Crawford Loritts
Second, marriage designed by God is a haven for couples to experience the following:
- Unity between a man and woman – “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’” Gen 2:18
- Permanent covenant not to be broken – God’s original design “regarding marriage was for one man and one woman to be joined, and the consistent teaching of the New Testament is for husband and wife to be exclusively faithful to one another within the marriage bond.” Dr. David Jeremiah, The Jeremiah Study Bible, pg. 1273
- Legacy/Godly offspring – “Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth.” Mal 2:15
- Positive channel for sexual energy (can I get an AMEN!) – “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled…” Heb 13:4
- Spiritual intimacy – A level of closeness/oneness that can only be experienced through the power of the Holy Spirit.
- Foundational building block for the community, society, and culture – healthy family, healthy church; healthy church, healthy community; healthy community, healthy nation; healthy nation, healthy world.
- Lastly, marriage designed by God comes with a blueprint. I know it’s been the cultural cliché to recite, “life is hard, and it doesn’t come with an instruction manual,” or “raising kids is hard work and they do not come with a manual,” but that is a lie straight from the pit of hell! God’s Holy Word gives you everything you need to have a successful life, marriage, and family on this side of glory. There is nothing new under the sun (Eccl 1:9), there is nothing that catches God unaware (Ps 121:4), and there is nothing that is impossible with God (Matt 16:26).
God’s Word should be the guiding factor in your life. Problems occur when we do not consult His Word regarding everything that touches our life. External and/or internal conflicts, issues, challenges, and the like will not shake or shatter the foundation of your marriage when it is built upon The Rock. But you must read His Word and then apply it – and for many of us, that is the missing link.
We know what the Word says about many things, but we barely apply it to anything. We aimlessly try to navigate this world and all its challenges without spiritual focus or divine purpose. It’s no wonder why marriages sever covenants and families sever ties. God never intended for us to try and make it without the wisdom of His Word (Proverbs 2). So, no matter what you’ve been through, are going through, or anticipate coming – believe God when He says, “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” Eccl (4:9-12) and then commit to living out this passage in your marriage. Life’s problems and challenges should draw you closer together, not tear you apart. There should be an impenetrable desire in your heart to truly be Together, Forever, Always!”
I invite you to join my husband, Phillip, and me as we continue to discover God’s design for marriage through the Ignite Marriage Ministry. Visit our Groups page in the Church Center App. We look forward to meeting you and growing with you.
Honoring God through serving,
Princess Fralin
Bridgeway is committed to supporting people at every stage of their relationships. You can speak with a Bridgeway Caregiver at bridgeway.cc/support or go to our Groups page to find more information about Ignite Marriage Ministry, Divorce Care, and Widowhood support.
If you are feeling discouraged or need help or support, please contact Care.
If you are looking for activities where you can meet others, check out our Events.
If you are looking for people to do life with, connect with our Groups.